This week’s episode and article were inspired by something I noticed in myself recently.
I’ve just returned home after spending a couple of months abroad for work, living in a different environment and without my usual routines, including my normal gym routine. Instead of the type of gym sessions I normally do, I was swimming most days and sometimes going for long walks.
Which was absolutely lovely, of course, and I was getting a good amount of activity and movement, but it wasn’t the same level of strength training or intensity that I would typically do at the gym.
So, after about two months away from my usual routine, I knew that when I start up again, my strength will have decreased slightly because I hadn’t kept up that level of training, which is completely normal.
But what I really want to talk about today isn’t the physical side of things, it’s the mental side.
The resistance that shows up
Since I’ve been back, which has been a couple of weeks now, I’ve been intending to get back into my usual gym routine, and I’ve noticed something come up that’s incredibly familiar. It’s something I’ve talked about before, but I think it’s worth revisiting because it will resonate with a lot of people.
And that familiar thing is resistance.
Not resistance in the sense that I don’t want to exercise. I really do, I enjoy exercise, and I value it hugely for my health, my energy, my wellbeing, and how it keeps me in shape.
But there’s always that little bit of friction when starting something new or starting something up again. That moment where you realise you need to push yourself slightly more to get going again. And this is something I see with clients all the time.
Whenever someone is starting something new, or restarting something they used to do, there’s usually a period that requires a bit more willpower and discipline.
Why the body resists change
There’s a very simple reason for this…The body and mind love routine.
Once a routine is established, it becomes familiar and comfortable to your nervous system. When you change your routine for more than a week or two, your body starts to adapt to that new pattern.
Over the last couple of months, for me, my routine has been swimming and walking rather than gym training. So naturally, my system and my body have adjusted and got used to that new routine.
Now that I’ve returned and want to get back into my previous routine, my brain and body have to readjust again – not just my muscles rebuilding strength, but also my nervous system and subconscious mind getting back into that rhythm.
And that’s when resistance often shows up.
This happens to everyone
I think it’s really important to say that this happens to everyone, even people who are very disciplined and even people who exercise regularly. And it’s not just with exercise, this can happen with any kind of habit or routine.
It might be earlier bedtimes or wake-up times, healthier eating habits, using some kind of productivity tool or system, keeping your home organised, or any other routine you’re trying to stay consistent with.
Even someone like myself, I also experience this from time to time, because life happens, things change… People move house, they travel, they go through busy periods at work, they experience illness or big life changes. And if those changes last for more than a month or two, it’s very normal for routines to slip or change.
Let go of guilt and focus on restarting
Many people get stuck dwelling on the fact that it happened. This is especially common for people who tend to be quite hard on themselves or have perfectionist tendencies. But that usually just keeps people stuck. The real shift comes when you let go of what’s happened and focus your attention instead on how you’re restarting and what you’re going to do next.
Restarting a habit is easier than starting one
There’s another important distinction here.
Starting a habit from scratch usually requires more motivation and willpower because it’s completely new. But restarting a habit you’ve done before is usually much easier because your brain and body already know the pattern. It’s a bit like muscle memory. Once you begin again and repeat the behaviour consistently for a couple of weeks, it tends to come back quite naturally.
Consistency matters more than intensity
This leads to another key point – the most important thing when restarting a habit, especially when resistance is showing up, is consistency in the early stages.
It’s not about perfection or intensity, which is what many people tend to focus on. Instead, the goal is simply getting the habit going again. Once it’s established, you can always increase or enhance what you’re doing.
Plan the habit into your schedule
One of the most helpful things you can do is something I talk about often: planning the habit properly in your schedule. Be really specific about:
- what you’re going to do
- when you’re going to do it
- how often you’ll do it
Frameworks like SMART goals can be very helpful here. The clearer you are, the less room there is for hesitation or negotiation with yourself. You’ve already made the decision, you’re simply following the plan. It becomes more practical and far less emotional.
A reminder from a former client
Interestingly, this topic came up again just this morning while I was preparing to record this episode.
A former client got back in touch with me. We worked together a few years ago, and she reached out to say that the last couple of years in her role had been incredibly busy, and some of the habits she built during our work together had slipped. She recognised that she now wants support to get back on track.
And this highlights something important about coaching. It’s not just about helping people figure out what changes will improve their wellbeing or performance. It’s just as much about helping people successfully establish the habits that support those changes so that, over time, those routines become a natural part of everyday life.
The key message
If your routines have slipped recently, or perhaps it’s been quite a while, remember that this happens to everyone… Even people like myself who work in this field. What matters most is recognising it and focusing on starting again. Even if you start in a small way, just to get the habit moving. Because the resistance people feel at the beginning usually disappears much faster than expected once the habit is back in motion.
Kate x
If you’d like support with rebuilding healthy routines, improving your wellbeing or productivity, or creating habits that actually last in real life, you’re very welcome to get in touch. And if you found this helpful, please consider sharing it with someone who might benefit from it.
